Freedom and Love: Commitment vs. Attachment
Imagine you're starting a new job. You're excited, passionate, and see long-term potential in the role. However, you're only given a temporary contract that might or might not be renewed after a year. How deeply can you commit to this job knowing it could be taken away? How can you pour your heart into it with the constant worry that the rug might be pulled out from under you?
When you don't have the freedom to truly commit, it's difficult to invest yourself fully.
The same concept applies to life, love, and relationships. True freedom allows us to commit fully without fear that what we've built will be taken from us. If you have big dreams—whether in work, love, or life—trust me, as someone who has spent 20 years as a squatter, community builder, and dreamer, you'll appreciate the freedom to fully commit.
Freedom to commit gives you the opportunity to build the dreams you want, without fear they'll crumble beneath you. It's not about being attached—it's about knowing you're free to create, love, and commit fully. In relationships, this is especially true. When you're truly in love, you want the freedom to build a future together, even if that means giving up your home, your dreams, and starting again, somewhere new—together.
It doesn't mean you're attached to a place or a situation. It means you're committed to love and connection, ready to follow your heart, not your property. That's what real love is: the freedom to let go of what you have to build something greater together.
Real freedom in love gives you the chance to commit, not just for 30 years, but for life. And if, after 20 years, things change—because our minds, hearts, and bodies are always growing and evolving—that's okay.
Commitment doesn't mean attachment. It means having serious plans and knowing that, unless something truly important comes along, you're in it for the long haul. Nothing better could happen than growing old together, in love.
Jumping from partner to partner, relationship to relationship takes away the chance for deep connection and growth. The clock is ticking, and with every false start, you could be wasting time. So while it's important to find the right partner, don't take too long—yet don't rush into it either. Some relationships may exist just to heal old wounds and prepare you for the "right one."
Forget waiting for the prince on the white horse or the princess in the tower. They may not exist in the real world. Get real.
Being alone, despite what some "nowadays bullshit spirituality" or "therapy" might tell you, isn't the key to happiness. Isolation for too long isn't healthy for your soul. We need connections to grow. Grief and healing take time, but not forever. I would say integration time, griefing, should be not longer than few months - but who am I to decide - you have to feel for yourself. It's you, who have to feel when you're ready to open your heart again.
That's why being in a committed, tantric relationship is one of the most revolutionary, spiritual growth paths you can choose. It brings freedom, love, and happiness. Choose connection, not separation.
Whether in relationships, community (a real one, not an online illusion), or family—commitment allows you to dig deeper, to heal old wounds, to grow. The deeper the commitment, the greater the opportunity for freedom.
Let's twist that this way this time.
20.10.24Serenity. Koh Phangan Thailand
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